Look what I did today!

I wanted (really needed) a snack, but there wasn't anything in our cupboard or the pantry. So, I made cookies. This was the first decent batch I've made since being home in November!

Yep, wore makeup and contacts with some of my new summer clothes!

glug, glug, glug

Water.

I can't stand the stuff. Except to drink. I drink lots of it every day (and chew the ice).

I can't stand to have water splash on me.
I can't stand showering (although I suffer through that once a day). :)
I can't stand jumping into a pool and getting the water up my nose and being attacked on all parts of my skin by the water.
I can't stand the nightmares it has caused me my whole life.

Funny thing is, is that I "make" my children swim a lot.
Last summer and the summer before, I took them to the pool EVERY DAY except Sunday.
The lifeguards even joked about us.
Here, I take the children swimming at the hospital's therapy pool several times a week.

I don't want my children to have my fear of water.
I want them to be able to drive across a bridge without fear.
I want them to have control if they ever fell in a pool or other body of water and be able to swim out.

Something I never really realized is how therapeutic water can be.
Taking the baby swimming last summer helped with crawling skills.
This summer it should help with walking skills.

The pool at the hospital is always set to 95 degrees.
It's like a nice, warm bath.
The baby loves it.
The children love it.
The children can be real kids in it.
They also learn about real life besides the bubble we lived in at home.
They see children with physical deformities, health struggles, and other issues.
They see children like themselves, who are siblings of patients.
They see adults (parents and volunteers alike) care for any child who needs assistance in the water.
They play with children who are different.

One thing I noticed today at the pool is how therapeutic the water is.
Children who can't bend their legs on land kick and splash all over the pool.
Children who walk with a favoring to one leg or another can swim.
A very heavy child can feel weightless.
A child with learning disabilities can be a water star!

I really don't like how water feels, but I like how it makes others feel.

the day my life turned upside down

Fascinating things, those diagnosis stories.

My friend and I were discussing her child's diagnosis story (everyone at this house has one). Her child has a similar, almost identical, leukemia as our child. Their diagnosis was in October, while ours was on December 2. Just like a birthday, everyone dealing with childhood cancer/leukemia remembers the day their life changed forever.

Anyways, she was telling me how when the doctors got the bloodwork back, they were explaining that they hoped the problem was leukemia because if it wasn't, the other two possibilities have no treatment. Then, the doctors told her that she had 15 minutes to gather what she could because she needed to meet the airplane after that.

Looking back, she was aghast that "They didn't even ask if I turned the roast off that I started that morning. They didn't ask about the other children. I just had to hope someone would be there when my other child got off the school bus."

This is the way it happens.

On December 1, I started making a baby quilt for a friend. I was supposed to be helping throw her a baby shower 3 days later. Leaving the fabric on the dining room table, Andy and I and the baby went shopping at the mall for Christmas. It was from the mall that we went to the ER and didn't return home until we were "allowed" to visit in late February.

Half my family is with me. Half my family is going on without me. It's almost like a death, but it isn't. Everyone in this situation misses their home, their families, their routines, normalcy, and the feeling of peace knowing that your child is healthy (which most people don't recognize because they haven't been forced to).

We are all so grateful for our family and friends who support us and pray for us during this time. Thank you!

chemotherapy

I just bought a vinyl saying for the back of my van. Pictures to come of that...it says, "leukemia sucks."
Sucks is not a word we use in our family, but it is the least offensive word to describe leukemia and chemotherapy.

So far, I have learned that chemotherapy is administered in at least four ways: oral (pills or liquid), through the central line or IV, needle injection into the spinal fluid, and needle injection into muscle.

All of them are awful, but necessary.

Mother's Day Weekend and playing in the bathroom

Josh was proud of his tall marble run.

He made it in the bathroom so he wouldn't make too much noise while the baby was sleeping.

We went to the zoo on Saturday.

It was sunny and a holiday weekend.

We won't do that again.

First thing to do at the zoo in Maggie's eyes is to climb the huge tree.

Maggie liked the bird houses in the water, above.

The kids were just as excited about the crows as they were about the official zoo animals.

Lilly had fun doing her hair last night with her friend.

Mother's Day was so nice. We got to go to church, had a divine brunch at the house, and spent time together.

Seattle Adventures!

Andy was able to come visit for yesterday.

So, we made it fun and exciting!

First was the aquarium.

Andy wanted to buy a hat to match the baby's.

After the fishy stuff, we went out to dinner.

First time for us at the Old Spaghetti Factory.

That food was divine!

I had chicken penne, the children (Andy too) had spaghetti. and grilled cheese sandwiches.

Then, it was time to get to Safeco Field for a Mariners game!

On the way, we took a wrong turn and ended up near Uwajimaya.

The children thought the dragon on a pole was cool.

Someone donated a suite for people in the House for yesterday's game.

It was Andy and the children's first game, my second.

The game stunk. We lost 0-8.

But, it was nice to be in the suite and to be out having adventure.

We loved having Andy come visit, but it ended much too quickly and he's back home for work.

We're hopeful to have a lot more time together in June...

Wow, it's been a week

The children were given the incredible privilege to be participants in Dance for a Cure 2010. They were taught a couple routines, one to "Beat It," and the other to "Bad." Both songs by Michael Jackson.

I was very touched by how well the other dancers (and there were many) treated my children, how well the teachers taught them the moves, and just how well we were taken care of by everyone involved. I only got to see my children's parts, plus the first 3 dances (out of many, many more) because the baby was too fussy. :( I've ordered the DVD and can't wait to watch the program!

I just can't believe that my children performed at the Seattle Center!!

Oh, and the children were wondering why a weird-looking guy was walking around in just his underwear afterwards on the way to the parking garage. I looked up at a sign for one of the other theaters at the Center, and they were having some erotica art-fest. Nice...made me want to gag.

Before the show, the girls painted their nails. Maggie loved her light blue nails.

The beautiful chandelier in the practice room.

I know my camera doesn't do it justice, but I don't have the time, energy, or money to get a better camera and figure it out better.

Maggie with blue eyeshadow on

Lilly with eye makeup and a fake smile

While the girls did girly things (hair, nails, etc.), Josh and one of the other boys (only 3 boys in a huge show) played chess on my computer.

The pre-professional dancers during the first song. AWESOME!!

Our group of children

After any kind of performance by any of our kids, we go out to ice cream.

We went to McDonald's and had McFlurries.

Josh can't leave his cell phone alone.

Monday, there was no school. The teachers had a planning day.

So, we went to the Pacific Science Center.

Lilly played tic-tac-toe with the computer robot.

She won. My children are all geniuses. :)

squirting water in the windy, rainy outside

The baby's new phase of chemo has been tough. Keeping food down has been almost impossible on some days.

So, Tuesday evening's dinner was a godsend.

There had been a mix-up with the people at John L. Scott and the house we're living in.

So, we were planning to make dinner when a message came on all the phones.

There'd be dinner at 5.

We got back from swimming and there was pizza!

One of the corporate people at John L. Scott heard of the mix-up and arranged for us to all have pizza.

The baby ate nearly an entire piece and didn't throw it up AT ALL!!!!!!

The baby ate more today and still just loved it. Yay!

The picture above is Josh eating his soda pizza.

He likes to mix his foods (anyone like peanut butter & jelly & lunch meat sandwiches?!) and poured Fresca on his pizza.

He said it was good and made the pizza taste a little fruity.

This wasn't even all the empty boxes.

Tonight, there was a pinata for Cinco de Mayo.

Dinner and the pinata were brought by Report Footwear.

Dinner was great, dessert was divine (strawberry shortcake), and the children loved hitting the pinata. Except Josh, it broke before his turn. I think we need to have a pinata every week for mental therapy.

All the chaos to get candy. You would NOT believe how fast they were all on the candy. Just about before the candy landed.

Josh got part of the shark's shell.

Whew! It's been quite a busy week. And, it isn't slowing down.

Tomorrow is a Mariners game and possibly the Aquarium beforehand.